First Date Jitters
Him: Do you need a ride home?
Me (autoreflex): No I’ll just take the bus.
Him: Are you sure?
Me (autoreflex): Yeah, I’m fine…
INNER ME: Dude…you screwed up! Captain Subtext is going to tell him that I’m rejecting him!
AUTOREFLEX ME: fuck!
INNER ME: you screwed it all up….You are in charge now so fix it.
AUTOREFLEX ME: FUCK!
Him: Well, OK…I’ll see ya. (he smiles)
Me (autoreflex in charge now): OK, I’ll talk to you later (I smile and WAVE?!?)
Him: Goodnight (he waves now too)
INNER ME: ACK!! YOU WAVED?!?! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT??
AUTOREFLEX ME: I don’t know….I don’t know how to fix it.. I’m just the autoreflex…I’m not MEANT to be in charge! My instinct was to wave…..
INNER ME: sonofabitch…We just can’t trust you to do anything right can we?
AUTOREFLEX ME: sulks
